As the year 2014 comes to an end, I just want to share the most hurtful event and probably the biggest storm that I faced this year… To my friends who will be reading this for the first time, keep calm and know that I forgave already. To all my friends, thank you for keeping me secured with your love always!
After my Licensure Exams for Teacher last August, I went straight to a Sunday service. Unexpectedly, there are limited volunteers in my ministry on that day, so even if I’m not scheduled, I volunteered to help out. I arrived home that night past 10pm and woke up at 6am the next day for work. Most of my friends asked me not to go to work anymore because they know that I am exhausted already, but because I love my students, I still teach that Monday from 7am to 5:30pm. After class, someone asked me to look after some students for an extra-curricular activity (by the way, this someone knows how tired I am for what I’d been through over the weekend). So, even if I am very tired, I walked with him to the practice venue.
However, while walking on a narrow and dark street, I was left behind alone by this someone, for some reasons which are totally unacceptable and immature. Right then and there, I called a missionary friend to pick me up, but I found out that he’s with the brothers and that scares me because they might all go and fetch me; they were all annoyed knowing what this someone did to me. This someone told me that he will bring me home, but to my surprise he didn’t (so much for integrity, right?). He could have walked me home, but he did not with another lame excuse.
I was shaken at this experience. I felt unloved and insecure. How could this someone just leave me there on that dark street with drunken men on my office clothes and heavy bag? I know and believe that God has secured me of my worth in His sight and love. Yet, this someone just tried to steal my security and feed me with words that make me feel unlovable and unworthy. Indeed, the enemy has nothing to do aside from stealing, killing and destroying.
I’m grateful that my spiritual family backed me up on this. I am restored immediately. That someone is (hopefully) out of my life, but what he said and did are still in my memories. I was able to forgive (even if I never heard him say sorry), and I’m trying my best to forget.
If there is one thing I loved best in this experience is that of hearing God say, “Ram, you are mine. You are my precious princess. Remember what my Son did on the cross for you? You are worth dying for.” With these words, I am affirmed that no matter how many times I will be dumped and stepped on to, God will still say, “She’s mine.” I may be left behind by someone, but God will never ever leave my side. I am scarred from that scary night. But, these scars made me stronger and more secured.
“Remember what my Son did on the cross for you? You are worth dying for.”
To all the women reading this, know that you are to be cared and loved for simply because you are worth it. However, we do not have to ask or demand from people to treat us right, thinking that we deserve it (that’s entitlement). We just have to be secured that we are God’s precious property no matter what others do to us.
Men, I encourage you to see women in the eyes of God. How will you treat a princess, a daughter of the King of kings? Try to leave her alone on a dark street, and surely, you’ll be accountable to God, her Father.